The Journey of My Births, Part 3

4 02 2009

I apologize for not post this last Wednesday, K came down with a horrible cold and administering breathing treatments every few hours, after coming off a nearly 24 hour nursing session with B, I couldn’t think straight!

I promised to share the journey of thoughts regarding my c-section and the reason(s) behind my c-section…

The Reasons…

We learned the first reason for his c-section only second after he was born – a ‘very’ short cord, which we learned, was the reason for the decelerations in his heart rate (every time I pushed, I was literally ripping him away from me). I later learned he was posterior and then even later (later as in, I was 30 weeks pregnant with B) I learned that he wasn’t coming down ‘straight’, but at an angle.

I know I could have helped the angle issue by not allowing my OB to break my water when he did. He had no reason to except “let’s get things moving some more” (when they were already moving along smoothly as it was). I could have helped the posterior issue by avoiding the epidural, continuing to move and just getting off my back in general (posterior babies can still be born ‘naturally’, it’s just that the back labor is killer). The cord issue could not be helped – would I have been able to deliver him naturally? Who knows…

The Journey of Thoughts…

When my OB called for the c-section, I was literally minutes away from asking for one. Not because I WANTED one, but because I felt that is what needed to be done in this particular situation. I had lost all will to push listening to his heart rate fall and stay in the 40’s.

While in the hospital, I didn’t really think much ABOUT my actual c-section. I was focused too much on recovery, on trying to figure out how to nurse and how to avoid hitting my incision, loving on our new baby and visiting with friends and family. Upon leaving the hospital, I knew I never wanted to go through such an experience again. I began my research immediately about VBAC’s (Vaginal Birth After Cesarean) and the laws surrounding them.

I spoke with my OB at my 2 & 6 week post partum check ups, and a VBAC was ‘absolutely fine’ for our next pregnancy.

What was interesting was, I visited my sister-in-law and neighbors at this particular hospital at 4 and 6 weeks after K was born and it was great. I recently visited this hospital again after my sister-in-law had her 2nd baby there, I about had a panic attack. I hope I hid it fine while we were visiting with them, but I was sick to my stomach and shaking upon entering the hospital and leaving…I had no idea that my c-section had that much of an impact on me.

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I promise next week I will have part 4 ready to go on time! Thank you for joining me in this journey!

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